It was just the beginning of summer holidays. Each day was getting hotter and hotter. She loved spending holidays with her grandparents in a small village surrounded by beautiful greenery. Most importantly she loved the fact that she could play games with her cousins and neighbors all day long without worrying about school or studies. Bed-time stories from her grandmother being the best part of her summer vacations. Like every year she visited her grandparents. So this warm evening, her cousins decided to play football. When her cousins and their neighbors started forming team no one was ready to take her in team. She wanted to play with them but they just shooed her away saying "this is not GIRL'S game, you will not understand a bit of it; go and play with your Barbie." That was the first time ever a 7 year old faced gender stereotype ever in her life and she was about to face it for the rest of her life. At this age she wasn't aware that girls' game and boys' game were different. She could not understand why she should not play football even though she wants to, puzzled she went back home.
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She ran to her mother, and asked "Why can't I play Football? Why it is a boys sport?"
Her mother, rather surprised, said "What nonsense! Who is feeding such crap into your mind?"
She narrated entire scene to her mother.
"Come with me I will show something" said her mother.
Her mother pulled out a sports magazine and showed her picture of a beautiful lady and asked her "Do you know who she is?" She looked at the picture and replied "No"
Her mother explained her "She is Mayanti Langer, an Indian TV sports journalist she has hosted many sports event. She hosted 2010 FIFA World cup broadcasted on ESPN. She not only understands Football really well but she has also played it. She has not restricted her to one sport. She hosts common wealth games and Cricket matches too."
"If she would have paid heed to such comments then she would not have achieved what she has achieved today."
"Don't let anyone tell you what you can and what you can't do because you are a girl. You are strong and you are important. Don't let others define your personality"
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Every year, the 11th grade students would throw a farewell party to both, the 10th and 12th grade students. It used to be painstakingly huge affair. It used to be a month of fun that included outdoor sport, fashion show, some dance performances and skit. She was very excited as she had always been good at dancing. She choreographed a dance performance. She and her team practiced hard. Team decided that she would be performing in center as a lead dancer. Few days before the event while they were rehearsing, her teacher walked in and watched the dance silently. Students reached out to teacher for her feedback after dance. "Everything looks good" teacher said, "Good job, just one suggestion though" team continued to listen carefully. "I think your current lead dancer is not doing great job."
She was devastated to listen to this. No one had ever told her that her dance was not good, she locked herself up in the washroom and started crying,that was when she heard her teacher talking to someone. She wiped her tears and moved closer to listen carefully.
"I agree she is a fantastic dancer and she is doing well no doubt but lead dancer should not be a fat girl. You are more appealing, more presentable, people like to see skinny-fair skinned face at center stage."
These words stabbed her million times over and over again. She was never hurt so much. Not even when her friends teased her by calling "Golu"(One who is round from all side). She was so broken that she decided to quit dancing.
She went home really really upset. This was just so unfair, literally. Thinking this, she turned on T.V and flopped herself on couch. That was when she saw a fat lady dancing like pro on "Jhalak Dikhla Jaa", she was none other than "Bharti Singh"an eminent stand up comedian. She astonished everyone with her lifts and 180 degree splits which others find challenging even to attempt.
Bharti tickled bones of entire nation when she did her first stand up comedy on "Great Indian laughter challenge". Those were the days when we watched only male contestants on comedy shows. She changed the Indian scenario of stand up comedy. In this male governed field, Bharti became India's most popular comedian.
She smiled while watching Bharti's dance performance and thinking how she has shown the world that size doesn't matter. She told herself I will no more blame my genes(those secret fatty deposits blueprinted in my DNA). She thought, people judge you based on your appearance and they will continue to do so. It's what they do. While one might not change their perspective...what we can change is our perspective for ourselves. How to do that? By not viewing ourselves with a convex lens.
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10 years later:
"I can't dance" said one of her student in her dance academy. "Who told you that?" she said.
"Look at me I am so fatty, I can't even move my belly"
"Never think that you can't dance because you are fat or you can't do certain thing because you are a girl"
"Look at me and look at those trophies I won in dance competitions" she said.
She continued " Don't judge yourself or others based on their body type. Change your convex lens...change your perspective"
